When I was in High School I thought I was the biggest loser because I just felt so rejected. Truth is, I was mostly rejected by myself because I suffered from “comparison syndrome”.
Looking back I can see that I was definitely an individual personality, with a very gregarious nature. Most of the teachers seemed to like me, although I did have some social problems due to over-utilised and yet under-developed leadership skills (another way to say I was a bit bossy)! However, I did make a significant wave in the school with my ideas. For example, when I was in Year 10 I refused to wear the more casual school uniform that had been adopted. We were allowed to wear corduroy pants or slacks and a white shirt and school jumper, however I just had to be different. I went to the local op shop and purchased the old box pleat school uniform including tunic, tie and blazer and started to wear that with tights just to be different. Well you know what happened? Within a very short time the whole school was copying me. And this showed me a very clear principle of life – if you are willing to stand out, eventually you will be emulated, because like sheep people will follow the strongest lead.
So I guess my challenge to you is, do you want to be a world changer? If so, start leading where you are! Do something that you’d like others to emulate.
I had lots of friends, but I chose to spend my time in endless activity to numb my internal struggle. I was the captain of the softball team, the secretary of the student council, on the debate team, the lead or support actress for the school musicals. I was selected to represent the school in various activities, including a state-wide production of Pirates of Penzance in Sydney and performed at the Opera House. I competed in Eistedfods and often won prizes. I also won the Miss Schoolgirl of the local show – yet, with all this success, I still felt rejected.
It wasn’t til many years later when I was working at the college that I later studied dance at that I learned from one of the girls who enroled who I had gone to school with that she viewed me as her hero. I had no idea that I was making any significant impact on anyone around me, yet here was the girl that played piano while I sang all those years ago saying that to me. It was immensely humbling.
If you have been following me on Twitter you will know that my username is @womencan. I deliberately chose this name because it contains within it a positive message for all women. I have deliberately created the “You Can Philosophy” because I want people worldwide to be empowered. These were all conscious decisions on my part and you can consciously choose to make your life a positive imprint as well.
Tonight I went to a party and an old friend came up to me and said, “You are so inspirational. Keep posting your positive messages cause you are my positivity guru. I read all your stuff and it really lifts me.” I was flabbergasted. Firstly because I just do what I do because it’s part of me and just has to find a way out, and secondly because I realised, once again, that people watch and follow a strong lead. You just never know who you are leading. Like the saying says, “Lead, follor or get out of the way!”
You can be one of the followers or one of the leaders. There is no shame in either, but if you decide to lead, make sure you are leading people towards something beneficial. Lead them in the same way that you would want to be lead.